ExpertDabbler

‘Give a life’ was the theme in the messily conducted Chennai Marathon. 22 year old Santhosh obliged and gave his life.

I am planning to have a post dedicated to my learnings in a week. Let’s see.

Everybody loves a good road in India, except those who get killed, and their families perhaps. It may sound odd if I say good roads are not necessarily good for India, at least with the existing habits of road users. But that’s the truth.

In India, I would dare say there is a direct relationship between the quality of the roads and the number of fatal accidents. Better roads equates to more fatal accidents. For e.g If one compares the Nilgiris Ghat highway and ECR road, the number of fatal accidents will be infinitely higher in the latter. Reason - speed kills. While one may be constrained to drive at 60kmph in Nilgiris because of the terrain, a well laid road like the ECR removes all such constraints. There is no concept of speed limit here. There are people who consistently make to Pondy in about 80 minutes from Thiruvanmiyur, a distance of about 130 kms – the road is not multi-lane FYI.

While there is nothing new in all these things, what makes me really worried is that India at last is getting into the habit of building multi-lane highways across the country.
Which means it is much more dangerous to violate traffic rules in future than it has ever been in the past. One can violate traffic rules in South Avani Moola Street in Madurai and yet nothing would happen. But doing the same in OMR would mean somebody will get killed – it can be the violator or the victim or both.

So what is the way out?

It is common knowledge that people in urban India have substantial western influence – from food, to clothes, to movies to English speaking ability. Given this urge, it is surprising that we are all Indians when it comes to following traffic rules - one of the few traits where we can ape the west for good. I think one of the main reasons behind our inability to ape the west in adhering to traffic rules is that most of the educated junta have no clue about how traffic systems work and drivers drive in the developed countries. They can see what suit a white man wears, they understand the language he speaks, but they cannot see how the traffic system works there. At least I had no clue till I made my first and only trip abroad. This is one of those things which one has to see it to understand it.

Why not leverage this ‘ape the west’ mentality here with the help of Videos? I think we, the educated masses are not getting enough opportunities to feel ashamed about our driving habits.

We should be shown smartly made videos which shows how the traffic works in developed countries vis-à-vis India? These can be played in strategic locations like Petrol bunks, bus terminus etc. I think this will definitely arouse some curiosity if it the message is kept subtle.

I would say there is a reasonable chance that the English speaking Indians would subconsciously try to ape the west on this as well. Even otherwise, Heck, what’s wrong in trying this? We have nothing to lose by trying it. As it is, we are losing people everyday in our roads. How worse can it get?

I agree that there are considerable infrastructure constraints in India. The population here is unbelievable, there is zilch traffic enforcement. But honestly I think the fundamental issue is the drivers and the mind set more than anything else.

I do not think having good roads alone will bring down traffic related deaths. History suggests that with our road habits, it is likely to go up. There is no weekend without accidents in ECR. In the famous IT corridor, I find stray cows sitting right next to the center median, gravel distributed all over the roads at night – riding two-wheelers require special skills here, policemen keep road dividers in the most ridiculous of spots, vehicles are parked for one- third of the road, MTC trailer buses swerve from left lane to right with relish. Despite all this, cars and buses ply at about 80-90 kmph by default. In short we have a crude but effective method to bring down the population.

The above outlined solution may or may not work. But I am certain we need to find a solution on war footing. And anything which makes sense and does not cost a bomb should be tried out. Because anything which causes us to lose a few lives a day is no less than a war – be it roads or terrorism.

Have you ever wondered how the Chennai cab drivers drive the way they do? Here I do not mean the auto drivers. Let’s talk only about the call taxis and the ones who pick and drop IT/ITES junta in Chennai. That’s not driving. Maybe calling it ‘madness behind wheels’ would be more appropriate.

There is an interesting backdrop to this. How long do you sleep on an average? I manage between six to eight hours. Six makes me feel groggy and eight is a luxury. Seven is more realistic. Many cab drivers on the other hand run virtually 24/7 managing to sleep only during gaps in the trips. Reason? Money baby.

The IT companies as far as I know usually get into an agreement with some taxi agency.
The taxi agencies are mere coordinators. The guy who drives for a shift is getting paid by the kilometers he drives, not for the hours he is on duty. This is more like a freelancing job. During my trips from Tambaram to my home during nights, I have seen taxi drivers asking if they can take the GST route. The reason is simple – that is the longest route, which means more money for him from the company. He drives, submits the bills based on the kilometers driven, leaves for the day. He comes back the next day or night as the case may be.

I am not sure if there is an efficient way to check he does not drive elsewhere during off-shift hours. Going by the way they are on the roads, I strongly suspect that is the case.

Much has been said and written about DUI (driving under influence) but not many know that driving without adequate sleep is equally dangerous. I would even say more because, there is no way to find out if the guy has had enough sleep unless he kills someone. It’s even more alarming that nobody even talks about this.

Try working without adequate sleep for two days in a row, your colleagues will realize how irritable and anti-social you have become. Whenever I have slept less, I develop a disrespect and disdain for everybody.

No wonder these call taxis and cab drivers are menacing on the roads.

People are elated about Tata’s Nano. Taking nothing away from Tatas, I would’ve been happier had they invented something which would sense the eye and detect if the person has slept enough. The ignition should work only if the person behind the wheels has slept enough. Why Tatas? They make the Indicabs, don’t they?

There are much safer methods to reduce population in the city. Let’s not take cab drivers help for this purpose. I wish somebody takes this issue to the next level and does a proper study.

Once upon a time there lived a UI designer, who with another designer in another continent completes a UI specification document in the second week of May.

Rest of May, Vetti

June vetti.

July Vetti.

As we are getting into the month of August, grapevine has it that due to developer resource constraints, the project will get de scoped. Which means lot of what we designed some months ago will be plain removed.

I suspect this will also be like that classic Vadivelu - Parthiban ‘Ingu nalla meen virkapadum’ comedy.
Only that I am gonna play Vadivelu and some other folks who wanted the UI spec ‘now’ during the month of May will play Parthiban.

Please tell me if you know any ashramam. I am okay even with Captain selvam types. I want to be away from all these dubukku documents, mokkai meetings, kandraavi conference calls for a year and have fun with wine, women and oor vambu.

Sigh.

For the past one week, I was updating my blog regularly, responding to mails – personal and officials promptly, going for long walks etc, all the while writing my final sem MBA exams. Yesterday and today, I decided I should focus on my studies and guess what, these two were my worst performances so far. So much for focus!

Now that I am done with it, I wanted to jot down some stuff that struck me this one week. My university study material sucks. All university study materials, except those that I’ve seen from ICFAI, totally suck. In fact we should do away with study materials. For the kind of fortune these universities charge, they should give us standard text books.

This being the reality, all our universities and their professors strongly oppose the entry of private and foreign universities citing ‘decline in quality of education, education becoming a business’ blah blah. Believe me, it’s worse than DMk calling ADMK
corrupt.

Actually it is the UGC accredited universities who have made education, especially the distance education, a huge looting avenue. It’s not even business. Ethical businessmen will turn in their graves if I call it business.

One of my study material talks about the ‘newly introduced economic policy 1991’. It’s like reading Dondu sir’s blog in English. I am sorry I can’t help if you don’t get it.
Agreed I joined this course like five years back, but still can 1991 be new enough in 2003?

Then why am I doing this crap? Home ministry pressure. My mom thinks her son getting an MBA is cool, even if it takes 5-6 years. Lot of beautiful young women of marriageable age think being professionally qualified means what you have as degree. They want only BE or MS or MLA err MBA etc degree holders as grooms. My neighborhood aunt who is also a family friend had passed some snide comments about me not being educated et al to, of all people on earth, my mom! So my MBA has far more significance than the Indo - US nuclear deal in Velachery area. For once I am giving the excuse Kollywood directors are fond of giving – Makkal idhai dhaan edhir parkaraanga!!.(This is what people expect!)

Now I understand why my friend paid that passing fee.

Anyways, my employers have not rejected me for the past seven years and that’s a comforting fact - helped me finish some of my financial commitments. And it’s good to get introduced to networking concepts and so on which I otherwise would’ve missed. I am not even sure if I will ever finish this MBA, but more likely I will figure out more about some of the subjects I liked in the course. Sh!!! Please don’t tell this to my mom

Education, career, love, marriage, having children are all public choices in India. People around the person have more say on these than the concerned person. While abiding by the rules, paying taxes, and following basic discipline are all strictly private choices. Nobody cares if you chase your exam papers, do not pay taxes for years, or flout all traffic rules.

Pk1:My friend completed the masters degree by paying a passing fee of Rs. 2000 per paper in Madras University. I thought about it and said to myself, ‘Okay it’s his choice’.
Pk2:Passing fee is a euphemism.

I wanted to respond to Karthik’s comment. But I realized that I had pretty strong opinions about the police force in general and wanted to record that as well. This is a blend of my own observations, my experiences being at the receiving end with the police, versions from friends of friends who are in the police department, and readings in the main stream media. Yes, the police story is a story of bad guys in the eyes of the public, but there is lot of apathy and tragedy underneath the obvious.

While I am a vociferous critic of the functioning of the police - be it traffic as well as law and order, I am almost certain that had I joined the police force, I would have been as corrupt a police officer as there are any now. I don’t remember when was the last time the police department got a salary hike. They cannot complain, they cannot protest, and they cannot go on strike. Politicians treat them like shit, the media sees them as jokers, and the public despise them.

I think it would be good starting point to compare the salary a cop draws in US, relative to other professions to what a cop earns as a salary in India. In India, its almost like their ‘mamool’ is factored into their official CTG (Cost to government). Not just the police of course, this holds good for any general state government employee too. But the kind of torture a police man goes through is unbelievable. He is paid a pittance for enduring all the suffering. Which means the society (includes me) expects him to beg, borrow or take bribe to make ends meet. With little legitimate money but with lot of clout, what will one do? Exchange clout for money. Thats precisely what’s happening.

A traffic police constable who stands in searing heat from morning till evening would probably make less than a post man. Check out this article.

What years of state neglect had done to their morale is that now a decent number of them have turned themselves into entrepreneurs out of corrupt money. I personally know one police constable who owns a water tanker lorry. I know because our flat association gets water from him. His monthly salary would be like six thousand rupees IMO. I am guessing that but if a DGP would make around 70K per month, how much a constable would make? Can he run a family, much less a water tanker lorry with six thousand rupees in chennai city?

It’s one thing to read this as condoning whatever they do. On the other hand, I think it would be wrong to just condemn what they do and preach about virtues like honesty, integrity and so on without addressing the underlying issues.

If I had any power, probably I would enhance their pay checks substantially, study how the police function in other countries, revisit the fundamental philosophy of the way a police department should operate in the post-independent India, look for ways and means to infuse professionalism and THEN expect better performance from them. I say about post-independent India, because I feel the Indian bureaucracy in general still suffer from British Raj hangover, in the way they treat their political masters.

I have been taken to police station for wrongs I did not do, and from which I escaped because of my network. I have given ‘mamool’ for the traffic offences I did and did not commit. I loathe them. But to paraphrase a dialogue in Hey Ram, ‘Oru police a ninnu partha dhaan avanga nyayam puriyum’.

Till the state home minister, who is also usually the state chief minister does something fundamental to change the police DNA, its better not to get caught by a police man. Or, have a hundred rupee note handy. If you are a non-tamil, better have a 500 rupee note in hand.

100 Hyundai Accents are good but not sufficient to fundamentally change the police DNA. Without the needed change in the DNA, Hyundai Accents have replaced Willeys jeeps and Ambassadors in dropping school children.

As an after thought, If you know about any good police man, please write, talk about him. Do some word of mouth publicity. That’s the least we can do. It’s not easy to be good and honest in such an environment.

Without helmet:

Couples - Allowed
Girl or Girls - Allowed
Guy or guys - Police maama will spot you in half kilometer distance. As you get near, he will walk in the middle of the road with both hands spread wide. Have you played ‘Kabadi Kabadi Kabadi Kabadi’ ??

Apparently, helmet rule violation is a filtering mechanism. ‘Licence edu, RC engey?, Insurance irukka?…1000Rs. fine kattu’ kind of customer mining will happen at round two.

“Aandavaa police idam irundhu ennai kaapaatru.. thirudargalai naan parthu koligren” nu kathanum pola varum.. aana katha mudiyadhu… unga vasadhikerpa 50 or 100 kuduthutu bathirama veedu poi serunga!

PS: Don’t ever tell them you are working in IT company.

Sometimes, life can be like an ‘aari pona’ dosai made of extremely sour batter. ‘Awful! Sucks! Depressing’ all are apt descriptions.

My 2 cents – When in distress, stretch yourself physically. If you are used to walking for 2 km, make it 4. Cycling, Gymming? should be perfect. Yoga should be even better!
If you work for four hours a day, try working six for a change. If you say you work for eight hours a day, try being honest. Probably honesty is all you need to lift your spirits. But yeah, essentially get out of your comfort zone even when you don’t feel like. Like the way your employer pays you even when they do not feel like.

Do this for three days. In three days time, life will be like that hot, crispy, rava dosa dipped in ample chutney at Rathna Cafe. Wonderful!

It worked for me last week.

PS 1: I do not appreciate ‘We tried the Rathna café rava dosai for three days and it was wonderful!’ kinda comment. That’s not what I meant even though that can sometimes lift your spirits temporarily. But life would begin to suck again when that rava dosai gets digested. Beware!

PS 2: Folks who know of better places for better rava dosai in chennai, please let me know. I am sure this information dessimination will lift your spirits for the rest of the day.