Moral Indians
I was browsing through one article by Gurumurthy. The writer begins in a manner which will hook any reader – yes the infamous, immortal Khushboo episode gets the first line. Then he goes on about how amoral sweden as a society is and how their family system and the country as a whole has suffered because of that.
The problem with people like Gurumurthy is that they have selective amnesia. And they forget that, a society does not decide like ‘Hey it’s 2007, so lets try to be like Sweden for a change’. No, it doesn’t work that way. A society moves from one set of practices to another for some reasons. It’s a slow long drawn process depending on environmental, economical and a host of other factors. So India will not become a Sweden in the foreseeable future. When it does, it will have its own reasons. So the only reason to cite Sweden in his article is to paint a scary picture to the readers. Never mind that we, like all cultures had a past with some glorious and some not so glorious practices which Gurumurthy will conveniently forget.
Also, since when did morality became equated to virginity and pre-marital sex alone?
According to the dictionary.com
Morality
Noun
1. concern with the distinction between good and evil or right and wrong; right or good conduct [ant: immorality]
2. motivation based on ideas of right and wrong [syn: ethical motive] Will Gurumurthy dare to compare Sweden and India on other moral issues/ behavior like law and order, corruption and caste discrimination, etc?
The actress that Gurumurthy talks about is running a peaceful family with her husband and 2 kids. She has made Chennai her home land and tamil her language even though she is originally from North India. As far as the general public knows, she has not spoilt anybody’s life by her acts and deeds.
On the other hand Gurumurthy, who essentially deals with the country’s elite for business purposes, would do well to look around his own friends, find the number of people who screw around, people treat their parents and wives and children badly, who think muscle and money power can do anything in India and give them a lesson on morality. That’s a more honest attempt to make this country a better place than all the gyaan on Sweden.
January 5th, 2007 at 8:59 am
i think it is a personal choice…
as simple as that..to each his/her own.
I think he is linking motta thaatha and..
avarukku bore adichurukkum, seri ethaavathu ezhudhuvom nu potturuppaar!
January 5th, 2007 at 9:07 am
In most cases a lot of these people were sexually and culturally repressed as young people and they can’t stand to see today’s young people enjoying more freedom in all aspects. Just jealousy over their wasted youth maybe?
January 5th, 2007 at 10:41 am
Happy New Year!!!
January 5th, 2007 at 3:51 pm
Prabhu, though I did support what Kushboo said, I fully agree with Gurumurthy’s post too. Freedom with restriction is always good. I am sure you would have been brought up with some restriction and that what makes what you are today. What Kushboo said implies for people who have already crossed the restriction (maybe imposed by others or by themselves) and therefore it makes to say “Dei makkalae, ippo ippadi thirureenga atleast safe-a irunga”.
January 5th, 2007 at 5:49 pm
Monu,
Precisely, to each his own.
Chennai1,
He is nobody to set the gold std. for morality.
syam,
vanakkam annathey! Wish you a very very happy and wonderful new year!
January 5th, 2007 at 5:58 pm
Ravi,
Actually in things like what we r discussing, what is essentially a life of freedom to me might be lot of restriction for you! Its all relative to the way one’s brought up, personal traits,exposure etc.
Our puranas have illustrations.
A guy who went to Dasi but who always thought abt God and another guy who was listening to some religious discourse but all the while thinking about a dasi. Who do u think went to heaven ??
On the other hand, its easy to lay down stds for morality in other aspects like crime etc.
If only people like Gurumurthy decide to do business with people of unquestionabe morals, either India would be a better place or he will be out of business or perhaps both.
January 5th, 2007 at 9:25 pm
Hi karthi,
I read the article…well…upto an age I think parental guidance is important.
As far as an adult is unattached…who has any right to do moral-policing?
Who are these people to set moral standards? And what was wrong in what Kushboo said…infact everything is right….she talks about being safe.
//As protests mounted, Khushboo rushed home, cutting short her Singapore visit and tendered an apology through a satellite channel./…from news.
But Karthi….when all of us are here supporting her…why did she apologise?
What, rather whom was she scared of? Why back off….she shd have stood her ground. The conviction you and I have…is not to be seen in Kushboo.Does she deserve our support?
Another thing that bothered me in your post is that she has made Chennai her home place….get me a job that pays me well(well enough to change my life-style)..and I will make that place my home town. After all with that kind of money….I can move my entire family with me.And for the same reason I will speak any language (with or without an accent).
And you have said that she has not spoilt anybody’s life….Karthi….I do not want to forget what Mrs.Prabhu must have gone through when Ma’am Kushboo was having a balle with Mr.Prabhu. Well…this may be common in thier field and I suppose any woman marrying a man from the film-industry has to expect this.
So…we can say…”hey woman…you asked for it”.
Finally, immaterial of what the Gurumurthys and the kushboos think…I feel each person should set their moral values to level of the responsibility they are willing to take and also taking their families into conisderation.
January 5th, 2007 at 9:36 pm
hey mind you..I am not saying anything about her escapade with L.
Siva…that is her and his problem alone and NO ONE repeat NO ONE elses.
January 5th, 2007 at 10:35 pm
Sree,
My first point, the post is not about Khushboo. It’s about Gurumurthy’s post and the way he’d referred her. I’d written about Khushboo sometime back.
But tell me are not the other vices common in our society??
Morality is more about right and wrong. Which means its much more generic.
And not what ppl like Gurumurthy write to give a very restricted meaning.
Infact people like Gurumurthy might prefer a society full of women who r like
Mrs. Prabhu. Indian traditions la??
January 5th, 2007 at 11:47 pm
Hey Karthi…
I dont agree with Gurumurthy when he points at Kushboo and I agree that the post is not about Kushboo…but are u not supporting her or am I missing a point ?
You say that Gurumurthy has no cause to talk about Kushboo…I beg to differ here.
When you and I are talking about morality…kushboo will be the last person to come in my mind…Gurumurthy may be in the midst of worse people but that does’snt make Kushboo a paragon of virtue…Criticise Gurumurthy’s views by all mean I agree with ur point..but dont support Kushboo
January 6th, 2007 at 12:39 am
sree,
I am saying this is not the acid test for morality!
I am nobody to get into the reasons for her affair with prabhu or whoever.
Just because she got into an affair with Prabhu does not make her a inferior woman to all those who do all other wrong things and yet get away scott free.
Atleast she’s been candid abt it. Right now she is not disrupting the peace in the state so i think she shud be left free..
January 6th, 2007 at 4:19 am
PK, I agree that morality should be self imposed but at times when it doesn’t, its good to be imposed too. In Gurumurthy’s post, he has explained how the institution of marriage has crumbled in Sweden and how this has had an impact on the society and govt. as well. In India, even now, divorce is seen as a rare phenomenon but its perseverance and disbelief in divorces which has enabled many marriages to remain steadfast. I am not talking about the suffering, no-way-out wife or husband but families which has seen better light because of marriage, the perseverance to hold the family intact. I will only have to support this point. Thats what makes us special but its sad that we are emulating the wrong things in the name of westernisation and though it can be aruged that its individual’s prerogative, lets accept it that in the longer run, its doing no good. And PK, just because there are ‘n’ other immoral things happening around us, we cannot allow the other things to get immoral.
January 6th, 2007 at 5:16 am
Ravi,
>>And PK, just because there are ‘n’ other immoral things happening around us, we cannot allow the other things to get immoral.
My entire point is, we r nobody to say X is immoral bcos he or she has loved someone in the past but married or is living with someone else now.
The definition of morality does not say ‘ You should be married bfore having sex and u shud be married only once in your life time’. But it talks about right and wrong in general.
I bet cheating on a spouse/partner, even in sweden will be looked down upon. But in traditional India that will be tolerated as long as its the guy who cheats. So who is immoral here, u tell me?? We don’t even attach ‘immoral’ tag to our own shit. But are more than keen on labeling the swedish immoral.
If in swedish society, if living together without getting married leads to problems and their country suffers as Gurumurthy claims, then its for the swedish society to come up with a solution. Tell me, do we break our head with the problems of every other country in all other matters?
We always assume that a marriage which never went for a divorce is successful. Not necessarily true.I personally know so many dysfunctional marriages where one partner will not speak to the other properly for 25 yrs.
Whats the big deal in staying married in such a situation, u tell me? So if the woman divorces and marries/lives with another man she likes, are we right in calling her an immoral lady?? I bet there are people who will. That is India for you.
January 6th, 2007 at 5:29 am
Karthi…
Maybe I have got it wrong..please make it clear to me.
What are you trying to say in this post?
That Gurumurthy should not have mentioned Kushboo
or
The content of what Gurumurthy said is not agreeable….
or
Is it a bit of both?
If you wanted to say the first…well I agree.He could have used a better opening.
But it does not call for this….
//The actress that Gurumurthy talks about is running a peaceful family with her husband and 2 kids. She has made Chennai her home land and tamil her language even though she is originally from North India. As far as the general public knows, she has not spoilt anybody’s life by her acts and deeds.//
There is no cause for you to give all kinds of unacceptable reasons for Kushboo to be left alone.
She is no Tamil and is not expected to be one.Whether or not she has made chennai her home…does’nt matter.
What you speak and where you live will not make any difference.
Spoiling some one’s life is a very vague term. But hurting someone is an understandable term comparitively. I think she hurt Mrs.Prabhu…well..the General Pubic knows.
And karthi….//I am saying this is not the acid test for morality!//
If having an affair with a MARRIED man is not the acid test..Pray tell me…What is?
I can understand living together, having an affair, having pre-marital sex…..
but all this involves commitment..right? what do u call it otherwise…free society? Chaos-society?
//I am nobody to get into the reasons for her affair with prabhu or whoever.//
Neither am I……I dont want reasons…No reason is acceptable. First say adios to your partner before getting into anything.
‘Inferior woman’….no one is an inferior being…not even a sentenced criminal.
I dont want to compare her with other woman who have wronged and was left to go scott-free.We will talk about them when it becomes news.
If you want Kushboo to be left free..all you need to say is “Just let her be!”.
Nothing more.
If its the second one that your saying in your post…I am all on your side.I dont agree with what Gurumurthy says. Absolutely not!
The third one….well u know how I feel about both.
January 6th, 2007 at 8:22 am
gurumurthy is right, tamil culture is goin down the drain, women wearing jeans, ellam wat is ths nonsense? all total bullshit. ellam freedom because women go to work, velaiku pona eppidi dhaan prechanai, adunala dhaan forbes la sonnanga pola irukku better to marry non career women nu, avanglukku dhaan culture teriyum.
even u blog in english, suthama tamil la blog pannugo!! summa enna english nonsense ellam?
ok i agree im bored
January 6th, 2007 at 9:54 am
indha madri pesi, india kalacharatha kedukarathu nalla illai. ennoda thalaivar ramdoss kitta solli oru porattam nadathuven valai padhivu ku edhura!!!
January 6th, 2007 at 2:19 pm
sorry to butt in with something irrelevant but what was that scoop on Kushboo and L.Siva???
I’m curious to know when it happened - From what I know, Siva fell into drugs between 88 and 93(not really sure how long) and Kush started off in 88, becoming TN’s No.1 in 93, so when exactly did this happen??
thanks!
January 6th, 2007 at 2:33 pm
Vatsan,
I am not sure if you are joking here !…Comeon….why shouldn’t women work? Why shouldn’t they wear Jeans…what is this Tamil culture BS ?
I think you are living in Stone age.
Women have all rights to do anything that a man can do IMHO.
January 6th, 2007 at 11:32 pm
vatsan,
LOL :)) Chancey illa!
TTM,.
Adhaaney? Thanks for pointing it out! Idhu theriyama enakku morning saaptadhu semikaadhu, night thookamum varaadhu!
NV sir,
Vatsan is making fun, tension avadheenga
January 7th, 2007 at 2:17 pm
January 7th, 2007 at 8:12 pm
pk, whole purpose in asking is to know how tamilnadu’s top actress at her peak fell for an ex-sportsman at his lowest ebb
January 7th, 2007 at 9:09 pm
TTM,
Preliminary investigation indicates that LS was after Ramya Krishnan and not Khushboo as alleged
January 7th, 2007 at 9:52 pm
hey TTM and Karthi…Neenga sharjah la nadandha aatam…I ..mean…. cricket ellam paathadhe illaya? LOL
BTW….TTM….idhu Kushboo. B.K. (before Kovil)….c/o Bollywood days episode.
January 8th, 2007 at 10:20 am
Sree,
Sorry it looks like yr big comment was under moderation and i did not see it.
All i am saying reg. khushboo is, she is not the single most threat to tamil/indian culture as she is made out to be. Thats why i quoted all the details that u r questioning here.
Second, i am nobody to get into the reasons why she got into an affair with a married man. She might or might not have her reasons.We r not privy to it and going by how she is in other situations i’d very well give the benefit of doubt.
>>No reason is acceptable
To whom? Sundar C finds it acceptable. Who r U and I?
I know straightfwd people who got themselves entangled in issues similiar to this.
I still think thats not the acid test for morality.
To each his own.
January 8th, 2007 at 12:06 pm
Who cares abt what Kushboo is and what she did or what she does..giving too much of importance to something which just takes up one time..she is just another human being..and yes an “actress”..so I think the public should just look at her performance in theatre and not her “performance” in life..not just kushboo for that matter, anyone who is in the cine industry or a celebrity in any field..sometimes I really feel sorry for them as their personal lives becomes an open diary to all..and people criticize them so much..
Hmm..speaking about morality, Is “Moral Science” still a subject in schools?
January 8th, 2007 at 9:50 pm
Uma,
I totally agree.
Moral science ellam total ku consider panna maataanga. so its shown its place:)
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